Sep 6th, 2004
OSETIA (HORMONAL DISASTER, I FEAR, AND YUP, IT’S 6 a.m.)
[EDIT 12th September] Specially busy / inspired. Not updating, but up to something 
(Nothing particularly grant, though) [/EDIT]
Last Friday I was going to write about the Osetia don’t-know-how-to-name-it, when even the most critical journalists were being rather optimistic about the rescue operation (at least, the Spanish journalists whom I was listening to) while it was evident that a masacre was happening in that school.
But instead of coming here and try to post something intellectually exciting about it, I just began to cry over my stupid problems because they make me feel stupid for taking me so much time when I should be thinking about helping remove the excess of shit there’s on Earth.
(And shit is not only on “the other’s” side).
And then I feel even more stupid for crying over my stupidity.
I never use strong words for the sake of it, but shit happens, and today I’m too screwed up to avoid using the word shit, mierda, merde, merda, cacat, Scheiße everywhere.
Because shit happens, and sometimes there’s not too much difference between dying of starvation while you are optimistic and hoping for food, and dying of starvation being totally aware that you will never get food.
Optimism requires a great mental effort, and now I feel stupid enough to prefer waiting for more shit to happen without even bothering to believe I could have the slightiest power to avoid it.
Being aware that sometimes I did thought that it was in my hand to do so makes me feel really, really, I mean really, stupid.
No, no great changes in my Earthly life; what it is more: everything seems to be going smoothly (until it turns into shit, because that happens too often in my very own stupid easy life as well)…
I’ll tell you more when this rush of hormonal paranoia has finished.
And that is the worst of all: the fact that my worryings about world stability might be only the product of a temporary bioquimical effect.
Bloody planet. I’m going hunting.
Take care, have fun.
See you soon in a (I hope) less pathetic environment.
Hola, me llamo Cristina MJ, pero en este mundo paralelo me dicen 
Hello, my name is Cristina MJ, but I'm also known as 
You’re completely right, this planet is f*%$#^. I was pretty pissed about the school bombing-thing too. But I hope you feel better
Remember, shit happens to everyone, you’ll get through it eventually 