.:.Callitoes Collectanea.:.

What should I say now and here?

Shall I talk about my painfully easy earthly life that I managed to convert into pure crap to supposedly make it funnier :uh:?

Shall I talk about others and start a sort of verbal voodoo with some of them :shh:?

Shall I talk about recent events that could compose a bittersweet symphony of parties, fun and stupid-crazy-great stuff with stupid-crazy-great-wonderful people whom I know I might not see again after this course is over :sad:?

I could also talk about this smiley:

which I have never used because that attitude drives me sick, but that from now on I will always associate with I-know-whom and then I won’t be able to avoid smiling and crying at the same time :neutral:.

But NOOOO! Let’s talk about TODAY!
I’ve spent THE WHOLE DAY home alone in front of (J’s) computer (because mine has hated me for the past three weeks and right now let’s say that things have improved between us and the correct expression to define the situation is just that it doesn’t like me too much) migrating 7 of the 9 domains I own to another server, building a couple of fanlistings for which I was approved almost 4 weeks ago (pretty pink both of them, but the topics need it :mrgreen:), and working on the basis of my (our: Setsuka is the other 50%) “little enterprise” (yep, that’s the word I want to use) as well as in a new brand fansite for Velázquez that I am building all around his fanlisting.

Links will be provided as soon as I manage to polish up the mess I’ve left everything in :smh:.

While waiting for things to up-download, I’ve also done quite a lot of handstands and flips in the sitting-room without breaking anything, not even myself :cool:. I should have done more abs, but it was so hot that reaching the abs part turned me lazy. Because, ALL OF YOU STEREOTYPES BELIEVERS: I AM A SPANIARD, BUT IN GALICIA OVER 22 DEGREES IS REALLY HOT. And even though Lódz dry heat should be easier to deal with, 32º C whether they are dry or whatever are already too much for my Galician body.

And that’s it, let’s talk about the weather…

The truth is that I haven’t ever really found a place that I call home: I never stick around quite long enough to make it. I apologise that once again, I’m not in love, although I seem to enjoy making me believe that I am; anyway it’s not as if I mind that anyone’s heart is not exactly breaking. It’s just a thought, only a thought.

And if my life is for rent and I don’t learn to buy, well, I guess I deserve nothing more than I get, because nothing I have is truly mine. In fact I haven’t learned anything new about life for ages: I only really learned how to survive, not how to live, and that’s not life.

I’ve always thought that I would love to live by the sea, to travel the world alone and live more simply. I have no idea what’s happened to that dream because there’s really nothing left anywhere to stop me. Again: it’s just a thought, only a thought.

And if my life is for rent and I don’t learn to buy, then I must recognise that I deserve nothing more than I get because, as I have said, according to that premise nothing I have is truly mine.

While my heart is a shield and I won’t let it down (I’ve already broken it on the couple of occasions I tried to remove the shield, so it has developed a thicker shield by itself) and while I am so afraid to fail so I won’t even try again, well, how can I say I’m alive?

There: the old song again.

Calítoe est un microbe vierge. Elle est morte. Vive Calítoe.:.

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I’m looking forward to having my laptop adaptor fixed soon…

A weblog is the best place on Earth, so far, to spit things out. It’s my favourite medium to cry out loud, as you may have noticed.

I’m saying this not only to justify myself, but to let you you that when I write here all that depressing stuff you’ve been reading recently (specially those of you who understand Spanish :P) is just to avoid bad feelings grow inside me, so I sort of “throw them out” here. I don’t like watching myself complaining and feeling self-pity, but sometimes I have to write things of the sort to demonstrate myself that it’s not worth it being in such a state and that I should struggle and get over everything…

Well, I guess you more less get the point.
I appreciate a lot your encouragement when I write all those pathetic posts, but please don’t get it too serious… I am serious when I write them, but I also write them to laugh at myself :).

And I’d rather change the topic for the time being.

Wordpress 1.5.1 is here. Check it out (you do know the URL).

(And there are more websites stuff coming soon ;))

Hugs for everybody.

Nadie me quiere (sí, me siento estimada, pero nadie me quiere para acompañarme en el sentimiento, nadie se ha atrevido a quererme así, y es un fastidio).

Yo no quiero a nadie (hale, estamos empatados).

El acumulador de la batería del portátil acaba de irse a freír espárragos (es decir, uno de mis mejores amigos está muerto hasta nuevo aviso).

Me voy a dormir porque estoy tan cansada que ni siquiera podría suicidarme.

Y hacer de “parapsicóloga” me deja a mí con el cuchillo de palo de la casa del herrero.

La verdad…
J. y yo estamos de película de Almodóvar.

Oooohhh!
The layout that is currently on this site is greatly based on other’s works and I’m not that cool but… I could have participated here… I guess…

Well, in fact, I did :geeked:.

I’ve been downloading like mad texts in Latin, Spanish, Polish, Italian, Portuguese, French and Esperanto (in that order) from Project Gütemberg’s website.
There are lots of classics and some really curious and interesting things.

Just one example: Conversations d’une petite fille avec sa poupée suivies de l’histoire de la poupée

I remember I checked the English section in 1999 or so and I still have in my PC some texts I used to learn my role in some Shakespeare plays in which I performed. I might go back to that English section to take a look at the new stuff, but as you know, I’m a bit fed up with English and I am pretty tired tonight. I know, I’m being harsh, but when I’m fed up and tired it’s logical I am harsh :dead:.

I’m sure I will not read most of them in my PC screen (I’m not even sure if I will *ever* read a whole sentence from the Polish ones :P), but I find them useful in case I want to use some excerpt for any thing.

Go and pick some texts yourselves! (And leave a donation if you can :)).

Dobranoc.

Not at all. Even though I am not a music freak (I’m a total illiterate as far as some aspects is concerned), my life is a musical, and sometimes things happen there as in the so-called unreal parts in musical films. Today (and somewhat yesterday too, when I went to Galeria Lódzka to give a practical lesson about shopping in Spanish to one pupil of mine :)) are good examples of that.

I’m really tired right now, so I will only post an outline of the “film” ;). I will call it Idę na Zachód na spacer (”I’m going for a walk to the West”, I think :P). Here it goes:

- Día de la Constitución en Polonia. Me visto patriótica: blanco y rojo. Santo Jud. Comida padres, me hincho de pastel. J. no se encuentra bien y no le apetece salir.

- Voy a casa, lavo mis camisetas favoritas a mano por si me equivoco con el programa de la lavadora y las echo a perder. Canto. Llaman por teléfono. Charlo por teléfono en polaco con Kasia S. Ya tengo una vida social intensísima en este idioma. Sonrío y bailo.

- Salgo de Radogoszcz hacia las 15.30 en autobús hacia el centro. Calor intenso.

- Conecto el reproductor de mp3 con algunas de las miles de canciones polacas que me ha pasado TG. Son los títulos de crédito.

- Empiezo a andar a las 16.00 desde Zachodnia-Legionów. Pongo rumbo Sur. Comienza el vídeo musical.

- La gente retoza en los parques, veo bicicletas por todas partes mientras oigo “Las májjjjinas de la muerte” (en teoría es “Las máquinas de la muerte” de Kazik) por los auriculares. Intento recuperarme del trauma de lo del móvil (el chorizo iba en bicicleta).

- Niños en patines. Niña que los mira a través del cristal de una pizzería.

- Parques bonitos. Edificios interesantes. Ambiente bucólico de un día festivo de primavera, de una tarde no tan fresquita de mayo. Shiny happy people all the time. Yo me agobio un poco, ¿soy yo también uno de ellos, chyba nie? Me dejo de paridas metafísicas y me convierto en uno de ellos, sólo que yo sigo andando y observo, observo sin parar…

- Giro a la derecha y me encamino hacia el Lejano Oeste.

- Niña perdida en Kaliska, estación de tren. La ayudo a encontrar a su madre. Mucha gente retorna de sus mini-vacaciones, sobretodo jóvenes, yogurines y jóvenes-yogurines.

- Me entero de los conciertos que van a tener lugar en Dekompresja. Vienen los “Dżem”, precisamente uno de los grupos que estoy escuchando.

- Llego a Retkinia y me la recorro de Este a Oeste. Me gustan mucho sus espacios abiertos, los colorines de las moles de viviendas, los parquecitos por doquier. Shiny happy people once again.

- Me doy cuenta de que nadie me conoce por ahí. Me pongo a bailar a ritmo de samba y un par de viejecitos tullidos me sonríen.

- Llego al final de barrio a las 18.00. Cojo un tranvía de vuelta. Hubiera podido volver andando, pero no quería que se me hiciese tarde.

- Les cuento mi hazaña a J. y a R. Me reprimo para no escribirle también a quién yo sé. R. me dice que si estuviera por su zona me invitaba a café. Nada que el tranvía 14 no pueda arreglar.

- Empieza a llover. Llego a Dabrowa, casi la otra punta de donde he estado. I’m singing in the rain. Carrerita hasta el noveno piso. Café, bombones y conversación con R. Gracias por la invitación.

- Vuelvo a Radogoszcz. Canturreo en el tranvía. El tranviero nos comenta que tiene que cambiar la ruta. A nadie del vagón le importa, a mí menos. Sigue lloviendo a cántaros.

- Bajo una parada antes para poder ir corriendo bajo la lluvia hasta la Plac Wolnosci.

Me planto delante de la webcam por si algún conocido de España la está mirando. Después del par de carantoñas de rigor cojo el 59 que viene enseguida.

- Un beodo casi se baja del autobús en marcha. Yo fui la única que me inmuté, aunque no llegué a abalanzarme sobre él porque la puerta se cerró a tiempo. El resto del mundo pasando de todo. Ya es la segunda vez que veo algo así…

- Llego a casa. Poco después aparece J. Sigue muy depre: digo y hago payasadas en su honor.

- Casi todo esto ocurre con la música polaca de TG de fondo.

- Mi vida es un musical. Hoy más.